Run… Forrest… Run…

Run, Forrest Run….is the best line for me in the movie, “Forrest Gump.”

According to me, this line starts the story, and since then, it tells the journey of a guy, who just did, what he felt like doing wholeheartedly.

This movie opened up many such things inside me; the film’s incidents are very versatile in itself. The title character keeps doing one thing or the other.

One of the qualities inside me, I got to realize, after watching this movie repeatedly.

The first time, I felt it was realistic because money didn’t matter to do things the way you want. You need to back yourself and believe in one’s abilities.

Success may be in the form of peace or the state of people’s trust, but it has always come to the people who have followed their conscience truthfully.

I used to wonder seriously three years back, “Why are people so different??”

I have seen my friends wondering about this.

It was distracting when people tend to react differently from what they expected. In hindsight, it was valid from the other side as well. There is no end to this.

I thought all things must have an end. Well, exits will be there for those with clear pathways; this behavior of the people and me are circular. It keeps going endlessly.

I got an answer.

  • People who tend to criticize always.
  • People who criticize partially,
  • People who don’t criticize at all,
  • People who bother about criticism,
  • People who don’t always bother and
  • People who don’t bother about criticism.

Now, this is being democratic; as long as I didn’t understand this fact, I had no right to be a part of Indian democracy or, for that matter, support for democracy.

Understanding the word ‘Democracy’ helped me gain a lot of knowledge about how I went about reacting to people in different situations.

Now, I don’t feel wrong about what I do in my personal life. Professionally we are supposed to adhere to individual disciplines but not at the cost of one’s pure consciousness.

Opinion differs, and I am just giving my opinion here.

The day I started loving myself, did things I always loved to do, life started looking different for me. I realized all things in life must come to an end because we aren’t immortal.

But memories aren’t. Hence I am writing this.

When I set out to be myself, I was afraid of losing people I love the most. It did inhibit me for a while; later, I backed myself by telling.

“The greatest tribute or respect I can give to my loved ones and my close friends and this world is by being myself and doing things my conscience told me to do and to do it wholeheartedly. If they are my loved ones and close friends, they will respect my point of view”.

I may not be able to rule the world, but I can lead myself. I may not be able to push others, but I can push myself.

More importantly, I cannot be sweet and pleasant to everyone; I can be lovely and friendly to myself. I am sure that if I am nice to myself, I can never hurt anyone, and it’s unfortunate if people didn’t understand this.

Probably they never will, and that shouldn’t stop me from being myself. And I am not afraid of being myself and for my actions as long as my conscious is right.

The movie gave me the realization that I am eccentric, and I was quite comfortable with it. I believe everyone is!!!

I started running the lap of my life for the first time, and trust me, except for a few miles, I really enjoyed and am still enjoying and will continue to.

People expect me to behave in a certain way irrespective of what I feel, including closed ones. I used to feel a little disturbed when I didn’t get to speak to the person I wanted to at that particular moment. “Rajan, I am busy; I hope you understand.” That was enough; I appreciate it.

But some of my other friends weren’t clear as to what to say, but they expected me to understand them.

People start avoiding. They can’t tell that they don’t want to talk to me because they wanted to create a feeling within them that would make me sweet and hurt me if they were frank. Strictly, it would always be, from their Eyes Only.

And others who wanted to talk but cannot express or couldn’t communicate.

But most of them expect me to understand them. Many would deny it, but the truth is truth.

It was tough because I felt sometimes they were using me. After a long thought, I realized, hey, that’s me. Why feel bad for people using me? After all, if I am helpful for others, why should I worry even though I won’t be having any personal gain, but satisfaction is that I will be myself, and that’s worth it for the little pain I went through.

But, being a novice mentally in this regard, sometimes I do call, but they still expect me to understand them and wait for them to call, and I am supposed to receive it when they are free.

Now, I accept calls from anyone in any situation. I shall never question them or remind them of their antics previously. If I like talking to my close ones and anyone, I will speak and accept them anytime in any situation. I shall give them their space.

“Past is history; you learn from it, you can’t live in it.”

Now, I don’t worry that much about it. I have many things to do in my life, but I am always available to people when they need me.

This is something I was, but I saw it in Gump, Forrest Gump.  I have the strength and patience to understand my close ones, and I take stern measures to understand them because I love them and respect them for the way they are.

I love and communicate even though I don’t get feedback because I love it.

Also, I always thought I was a good wicket-keeper and a good soccer goalkeeper. I follow the rule of being a keeper.

My job is expected to catch, no matter how challenging a catch is or how tough a save is, ultimately I don’t get the reward for the trap because I am expected to catch or save the goal day in and day out.

What if I dropped or gave a goal away? I get to hear, “You didn’t live up to our expectations, a bad keeper or a bad goalie.”

So I believe in doing my job wholeheartedly, just like a wicket-keeper or a goalkeeper in real life. I am expected to catch everything but can’t drop any. That’s ok, as long as I am a wicket-keeper or a goalkeeper in real life and ready to do it wholeheartedly.

To tell you, I am dedicated.

One thought on “Run… Forrest… Run…

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